Misusing Humor
Too many times in my history I in all foolishness said things trying to be funny and instead I was offensive.
Too few times I was confronted on it.
Even fewer times did I receive well and non-defensively.
In time I learned.
I just wish I didn’t take so much time.

The idolatry of Humor
I sweat when I am not funny and I was trying to be.
Humor is the god I seek to protect me when threatened.
It is the god whom I seek to give me power among the people.
Why would someone mess with my god?
“It was all done in humor can’t you take a joke?”
Being funny is in high demand in our world. Because it entertains. And people will like us. We all want that. That’s why we can get all defensive at first.
The question is, “do we dig our heals in deep or do we take a step back and listen?”.
Was Jesus really funny?
Does it really matter?
Is any rationale that he was just a means of rationalizing our own misuse of it?
I am not writing here to identify godly humor vs ungodly humor.
Just want to consider the idolatry of it.

Shame remnant
I get these shame farts once in a while. These are memories of things I regret that seem to come into my consciousness out of nowhere. Not talking about memories of the huge, life-changing mistakes I have done. Many of those have been dealt with between me, God and anyone I might have offended. But rather I am referring to little farts that are embarrassments way in the subconscious, hidden until they bubble up out of my bowels (have you read the research on synapses in the bowels and the reconsideration of all thoughts and feelings are not from the brain? but that is for another blog). Sometimes they are just one of the top ten most embarrassing moments. No need to attend those until I am asked in an ice-breaker to name one. But others come out of regret and guilt. Mistakes I have made. Sometimes they are things I have done that have hurt another. Boy, I got away with way too many. I am thankful for the grace of God that covers all of these. I am grateful for opportunities to make things right. And in hind sight, I am thankful for those brave souls that confronted me about my stuff.

Looking back, I think what was most damaging to my own soul and perhaps to those I offended was not the initial mistake or wrong doing I made but in the ways I stayed on defense.

I hope I am a much more approachable man today than I was in my youth. By the grace of God I hope I am getting better.