What is shame?

General (universal) shame
feelings of inadequacy
lack of self-containment (out of control)
feeling of exposure
Empty and alone

Cultural-base shame
Losing face
Embarrassing another
displeasing family-significant others
self-defacing
not being sensitive toward another
falling short of obligation
losing control

guilt is relational rather than objective

guilt base culture (based on rules)
shame based culture (based on ralationship)

True shame= conviction
Jeremiah 6:14-15
Lack of shame=Losing the pain of doing harm to another
False shame- a susceptibility to other’s (including inner voices) accusations and blaming even when we haven’t done wrong

Asian Shame

I did this survey back in the early 90’s and wonder if you guys think it still pertains. Do you think Asian American men experience shame different than Asian American women? Do you think the first two categories are the main ways Asian American men experience shame as the study may indicate? Are those categories experiences you have? Which ones more than the other?
Thanks for any thoughts you would share

Four components of Internalized Shame

Feeling defective or not measuring up (Perfectionism)
Feeling embarrassed or exposed (or afraid of exposure)
Feeling empty and alone
Feeling out of control

Surveying 190 college students of various Asian American backgrounds and of various acculturation levels (first generation here to fifth), the shame scores were significantly higher among these Asian American students then with large sampling (300 Caucasian students). Also shame scores had no significant differences between the different cultures of the Asian American students nor a difference between the various generation of acculturation (first generation through fourth showed no differences). No differences between sexes, though I suspect different genders experience shame differently. Also the Asian American students scores were highest with the top two categories (not measuring up and fear of exposure) and lower than mainstream sampling in the bottom two categories (out of control and empty and alone).
The internalized shame experience of the Asian American students not only blew the scores of the general population but even outscored the medium scores of the sample taken from an inpatient sample pool.

From Jon Ido Warden (1993) “Issues of Internalized Shame in Asian Americans: Study of Asian American College Students” The Emerging Generation of Korean Americans, Kyung Hee University Press pp283-308

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